Saturday 14 November 2020

Saturday Variety

It's All On Line Episode 342

Maybe it's because of the lockdown, but First Bus in Sheffield is tinkering with their timetables again. Assuming that, before tucking into your Full English each morning, you spend a pleasant half an hour exploring the near impenetrable jungle of public transport web sites, you discover this in "news and updates".

From Sunday 15th November

56 Nether Edge - City - Wybourn

There will be additional journeys added in on Saturday evenings.

X1/X10 Sheffield - Doncaster

Minor timetable changes will be made in the morning peak, with additional running time to assist with punctuality. 

Ahem! The X10 doesn't run to Doncaster.

X78 Sheffield - Doncaster

Minor timetable changes will be made, with additional running time added at the morning and afternoon peaks to assist with punctuality, to maintain regular departure times with the 221.

fbb reckons that the X78 timetable is "revised" at least twice a year and has been since the halcyon days of the great Great Britain Bus Timetable  You might think, over the years, the company could get it right - at least for a couple of years at a time.

Travel South Yorkshire also highlights (?) the changes. Again, you have to dig deep and tediously to find them in the full timetable changes list.

TSY doesn't attempt to qualify the advance notice - so we have no idea how drastic these changes might be until we examine the timetable. It might be OK to maintain "co-ordination" with the 221 at Doncaster, but it is less appealing if that "co-ordination" runs out at the first time point after leaving the Frenchgate Interchange a k a Doncaster bus station.

First is much more helpful as they say (concentrating on the X1/X10 NOT to Doncaster) "minor changes".

What, you may ask, constitutes a "minor change"? One minute? Two minutes? Five minutes? How if you have a connection to make?

Thankfully, First have also published the "forthcoming timetables". In fact the company has simply republished a full set of timetables which includes the Sheffield's three that have changed.

So here is an extract from the old X1/X10 which, technically, ends today. We are interested in Monday morning early/peak.

We have just finished a night shift at Meadowhell, cleaning and shelf stacking, and we stagger, bleary eyed, to the bus station (sorry, "interchange") for the 0622 to Quilter Road for a quick snack and then beddy-byes. We are not worried because there are only minor changes.

And here they are:-

Well, now, there's a thing. The 0622 left at 0607 and we have now got a joyous 15 minutes to wait for the next X1/X10, also with a "minor" timetable change.

15 minutes, and 15 minutes EARLIER to boot, is an interesting take on the definition of the word "minor". But it is all on line.

Good, innit?

Talking of Maps?

How good are our readers at "Metro Spotting"? The above is easy, as it has remained broadly the same in concept, if not in detail, Since Harry Beck came up with the idea in 1931.

How about this one?

Of course (!) it's Delhi.

This one ought to be easy, but we are not at all familiar with this geographical version.

The "M" logo is one hyper clue - and indeed it is Tyne and Wear.

Some "maps" barely qualify for the title. Here fbb has removed the station names, but it should still be obvious.

Indeed, it is the Glasgow Subway, soon to get its super new trains, and after a while, to go fully automatic.
So, how's your German? This popped up recently as part of some Twitterings.
Universitat - should be easy

Auf Monchsitzplatz West - humm?

Lichtenstadion - easy for Footy followers?

Sud Hugelstadt - might be OK

Perle - is a bit of a cheat

Sunterland - gives it away

Grafschaftsumpf - Yikes!

Of course you twigged! Some wag has "translated" all the Tyne and Wear Metro stations into German. Yet more delights emanating from the Great British eccentric.

But you have to admire Brokkoli Gewinnt for Brockley Whins.

How about London Underground stations in Esperanto? - No, please don't bother!

And For Bus Spotters

But which Park and Ride?
Maybe a clue?
Gottit? So where was it photographed?
Which part of Canterbuty?
Obvious?

It is just setting off on the 1208 service 7 to Moulton Park (as you can see from the blind display); departing from North Gate Bus Station ...

IN NORTHAMPTON!

Correspondent Alan reports, excitedly, that it was carrying a correct "On Hire to Midland Red South" label. No mention of St*g*co*ch in an obvious position, but Northamptonians boarded without an eyelid blink.

It's a bus, innit? It's going where we want to go, innit?

Trendy route branding, swirly livery - Phooey!

Northampton has acquired a batch of double deckersrs to assist with "soical distancing" in board.

Famous The World Over

Windows 10 is set up to present you with a stunning photograph for your "log in" screen. These pictures come from all over the world; some being very obscure but all being very beautiful. fbb does not know whether they are chosen at random from a very large cardboard box somewhere in the darkest recesses of the Mictroslop HQ or whether there is some dark and devious purpose hidden deep in the compan's business plan.

But a recent arrival is of somewhere known to fbb - and a large number of UK rail enthusiasts.

The Ouse Valley Viaduct (or the Balcombe Viaduct) carries the London-Brighton Railway Line over the River Ouse in Sussex. It is located to the north of Haywards Heath and to the south of Balcombe. Known for its ornate design, the structure has been described as "probably the most elegant viaduct in Britain."

"Hear Hear!" shouts fbb! 

Construction of the Ouse Valley Viaduct commenced by the London & Brighton Railway company during 1839. It was designed by the principal engineer for the line, John Urpeth Rastrick, in association with the architect of the London to Brighton railway, David Mocatta. The viaduct is 96 feet (29 m) high and is carried on 37 semi-circular arches.

The fbb phone photo of the screen does not do either the picture or the viaduct anywhere near its due justice, so here is a better version discovered via the interwebnet. (click on the pic to enlarge).

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Tomorrow we answer the age-old question. What links a shoe factory, a composer, three vacuum cleaners and a floor polisher with Northampton's railway station?

fbb's blog does tackle some of the great Philosophical Challenges of the 21st Century.

 Next Variety blog : Sunday 15th November 

1 comment:

  1. Ha! Like a Dominic Cummings scripted press conference FBB has his mantra "But it is all on line" and repeat, repeat, repeat ad infinitum until it must be true because it's been said so many times.

    The issue here isn't that the information is online - indeed having the information online is probably a damn sight more helpful to FBBs envisioned shelf stacker than other alternative means. The issue is Quality and Clarity of communication. It is the same sh!t information wherever it is published.

    Wrong information is no more wrong because it's on a webpage than if it were in a timetable frame or in a timetable booklet or leaflet.

    In this instance the issue seems to be one of semantics as to what is minor - I'd class a timetable change where the majority of departures stay the same as being minor, even if one or two departures see more substantial revision. But, I guess the user of the revised journey may not agree.

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