Tuesday Variety

 D & G : Delightful & Gorgeous

Old readers will remember the Midland Red brand of Chaserider, now adopted by D & G Buses for the Cannock and Stafford area routes taken over from Arriva. The D & G people announced that there would be np changes from the Arriva timetables (should they have added "yet"?).

A few days ago, fbb received timetable leaflets for the two areas concerned (thanks Julian!) and, as expected, they are superb productions.

There are excellent network maps ...

... accompanied by town centre plans.

And there are proper timetableS, none of the unhelpful frequency summaries which are of no use to man (nor woman!) nor beast.

Worthy of note is the inclusion of routes operated by Select Bus Services (fbb presumes tendered) to ensure that passengers have full network information.

This sort of material would seem to be better at "Creating Desire" than painting the bus in splodgy new liveries.

So why do the big companies hide behind the "its all on line" (and very hard to find) non-joke or, even worse, the lie that they do not have the "resources" to issue printed material. Both of these excuses have an obvious translation, i.e. "we can't be bothered".

There will be more on this in tomorrow's blog - and not from fbb but from a professional transport consultant.

As the great Barry Doe once opined, "If the companies are making enough money (currently from our taxes!) we cannot force them to attract more passengers by issuing good publicity.

Trust Pink, Forget ...

... Indigo! One of the first pinks has been spotted at Washington, Tyne and Wear; the latest re-brand from go Ahead. Looks smart?

And, as fbb surmised ...

... Pinks are repainted IndiGo buses.

Some wag has suggested some alternatives ...

... and there are other rhyming names which might get used if the buses are always late.

It's About Boxes - No 1

A while ago, fbb reported that the former signal box at Torre (Torquay) was being auctioned.

Well, if you wanted to buy it - it is too late.

Nearly 66 grand seems cheap for a three storey residence, but maybe, after substantial conversion costs ,a nice semi up the road would offer better value.

If only fbb were 30 years younger ...

And significantly richer!

It's About Boxes - No 2

A new report recently told us that on-line retailers are running our of cardboard, such has been the increase in Amazoning and EBaying (etc) under the present unprecedented circumstances. fbb thinks he knows why. Here is a recent delivery from Hattons of Widnes. And inside ...

... loadsa packing, a Christmas 2020 catalogue ...

... and another box. And inside the other box, more packing and ...

... a very small box. And inside the very small box ...

... a Trix tank wagon liveried for UD (United Dairies) incorrectly on deep green. Incidentally fbb received another tank wagon  yesterday from a private seller. It cam, protected by a layer of bubble wrap, in a jiffy bag.

It's About Boxes - No 2

The advert for the UD tank wagon said "poor box". Which it was. But it was a very special poor box.

Trix wagons came in these poor boxes as a result of immediate post WW2 shortages. fbb might, were he an avid collectors of model railway boxes, have sought o buy one on-line; just a box. He would have been in for a shock.

£8 for a bit of skanky cardboard is an OUCH, but £18.50 for postage, even from Germany, must be some sort of rip-off. 

Anyway, fbb's box came for nothing!

Thomas Hard At Work

We all know that Thomas, like Father Christmas, has the ability to be in several places at once; but most of those places are heritage railway lines seeking to make a bob or two by attracting the kiddies. In so doing, of course, they make a fat wedge for the Thomas Company and its leading light and son-of Rev Wilbert, viz Christopher Awdry.

But it is good to see Thomas getting occasional jobs on the Main Line on the Other Island. Here he is (thanks to Twitter) seen hard at work hauling a broken down Flirt c/o the nationalised railways of the Netherlands.

It must be true, because it is all on line.

Or maybe not?

That looks like the squashed Thomas, produced by Bachmann ...

... rather than the proper Thomas that used to be made by Hornby!

Another Livery Tease

It is from Lancashire a Mellort Strata midibus and fbb presumes (?) that Transdev have won some tenders from Lancashire. The company already has similar vehicles on Keighley town services ...

... with (in)appropraite branding.

Jets? Up all those steep hills?

Tomorrow, amongst other things, we hear from this man:-

Also from this man ...

... via transport broadcaster Tim Dunn.

 Next Wednesday Variety blog : Wednesday 10th February 

Jumping Through Hoops

When fbb plans a "Royal Progress", the aim is to make the best use possible of the convoluted fares system that bedogs any sort of journey planning. Likewise the attempts by the industry to hide their timetables and force innocent users to accept decisions made by technology gurus need to be overcome.

The trip that started this morning was provoked by a varied "shopping list".

1. Visit Sheffield to explore and reminisce (fbb and Mrs)

2. Visit some old chums (mainly Mrs)

3. Try to publicise GoTimetable Sheffield

4. Have a bit of a break from hectic normality

5. Meet up with chum David at Groby, Leicester

6. Visit Ruth (in Knowle), a stalwart of the fbb's Sheffield bible group

7. Visit brother-not-in-law-any-more in Sutton Coldfield

8. Keep the stress level as low as possible!

Do it all by public transport but (on the trains) with flexible rather than special offer tickets to allow for short-notice changes of plan.

Tall order!

The big problem is that "Off Peak" (used to be "Saver") tickets do NOT allow overnight breaks of journey on the outward leg; but DO allow return any time up to one month from outward journey with as many breaks of journey as you may like.

So - go straight to Sheffield and do the other visits on the way back. Seemples

Axmnster to Exeter St Davids

Exeter St Davids via Birmingham ...

... and on to Sheffield.

A simple journey.

The return will cover Knowle (from Birmingham Moor Street) and Sutton Coldfield (from Birmingham New Street.

But, help! Leicester is not on the direct route.

But maybe ...

A quick e-mail to the only person in the Western Arm of the Galaxy who understands rail fares; and back comes Bazza with the answer.

"You are in luck. The Routeing Guide allows travel between Sheffield and Birmingham via Leicester."

So off to Axminster to buy a couple of "Off Peaks" to Sheffield with old fogeys card discount. £96.65 each.

fbb decided not to investigate the curious Maths alternatives and stick with the £96.65.

But, as ever, the very nice man in Axminster Station ticket office refused to sell fbb two of those.

He sold him FIVE of these ...

... TWICE (that's 10) and 10 for the return, a total of 20 little pieces of cardboard for the two fbbs.

Let's do the math!

Axminster to Bristol      20.45

Bristol to Cheltenham     12.80

Cheltenham to Birmingham  17.75

Birmingham to Derby       12.30

Derby to Sheffield        14.90  

Total Off Peak return     78.20

A saving of £36.90 on the two returns.

But there was a last minute panic. Would the route via Leicester still apply if the journey were priced in bits? "Yes, averred the ticket clerk, there a green tick." Where or why a green tick matters is outwith fbb's knowledge, but it seemed to satisfy the man of the moment.

So we can now put together the whole schedule. But that would be too much fun in one blog, surely. We will take our excited readers as far as Sunday evening.

Saturday

0903 Axminster

0944 Exeter St Davids

1024 Exeter St Davids

1418 Sheffield

First Bus service 120 to ...

BandB overnight

The gaff is on Fulwood Road, near Nether Green ...

... with bus stop right outside and looks posh - but is not expensive.

Sunday

First Bus 120 to and from Fulwood Church ...

... and back into the city centre after conclusion of 1100 service.

The fbbs attended Fulwood for the duration of their 30 years residence in Sheffield, so there may be a few old crocks to greet and remember!

Sheffield Interchange 1410  T M Travel 273

Castleton             1510

The 273 is a magnificent ride via Manchester Road and glorious moorland, Derwent Dams and Bamford. 

Time at Castleton for tea and a bun?

Castleton             1632  1710   First 272

Sheffield Interchange 1731  1827

The 272 is also a pleasant ride with panoramas of the city from Fox House onwards. Castleton claims to have a bus station, bus yard more like ...

... but at least you have no problem finding your next bus.

Back to Nether Green on the 120 ... and so to bed, probably sooner rather than later.

In tomorrow's blog we have some assorted bits up on which to catch!

 Next Weekend collection : Sunday 15th September 

Farnborough Fun : Farnborough Farce (2)

The Gold Experience

Of course, there were no timetable leaflets at Farnborough Station (half-heartedly "Main") for Stagecoach "Gold" service 1, although there was room on the rack ...

... and plenty of room for a second rack for bus information.

The single rack (as above) was not in place when the "Station Map" was assembled for the Notwork Rail enquiries web site. First Group have promised better bus/rail interchange information for their South Western Railway franchise, but, as with everything in today's rail industry, it could be years before anything happens - if anything does..

Standing at the station entrance, it is clear that things have changed since Google Streetview took its pictures. The single bus stop was on the left ...

... with taxis on the right.

Now there are parallel bus lanes with shelters on the right as in this over enlarged view from the street.

Gold leaves from R and S whilst other, less frequent, routes leave from T (far right). One of these services is the delightfully named YoYo ...

... (yes, really!) which pops in at peaks only.

The "Gold" bus stop flags are looking very faded ...

... and can be quite difficult to read. There is plenty of space in the frames ...

... for timetables to augment the simple departure list, but there are none. 

fbb was well impressed with the buses, still shiny from their introduction last December. And there, neat the foot of the stairs ...

... was a slot containing timetable leaflets. The leather seats, the "wood effect" floor and the shiny lights on the stairs were cosmetically impressive; but would they actually attract extra customers? What was really helpful to fbb and Mrs were the on-bus announcements and next stop displays.

These made the journey stress free and replaced a hesitant peering out of the window for something that said "Netley Street". Image is everything, we are told, but the dark blue and gold maps leave a lot to be desired for legibility in gloomy light conditions.

The "real time" screens were working but another information inconsistency appeared.

"Montgomery Lines" does not appear anywhere else  except on Traveline's detailed timetable.

fbb would like to show you a photo of this part of Aldershot, but Google Streetview cameras were switched off and a chunk of Gold route 1 remains, presumably, subject to the Official Secrets Act.

No go  beyond here as service 1 passes the barracks!

fbb was generally impressed with Gold, but disappointed, yet again, that full information was hard to find. But, according to at least one anonymous, the old man is living back in the 1950s in expecting to be able to obtain a printed timetable for a bus service.

Sunday 1st October involved a lovely visit to Farnborough Baptist Church, small but very friendly ...

... followed by the Ruby Wedding Bash in the Meade Hall at the Crown and Cushion Minley.

Meade Hall? Apparently an ancient name for a communal building for communal feasting and communal rejoicing; there's one in Beowulf!

Return to Axminster was "as outward route reversed". It could have involved a bus from Farnborough to Basingstoke, but, by the time the fbbs were delivered to the "Main" station, normality was restored as shown by the display just above the (unmanned) entry barriers.

Normality?

Everything from Waterloo was running about ten minutes late "due to an earlier incident", so the fbbs operated a "suck-it-and-see" approach to their journey home by hopping on the first train to Basingstoke (for which there was a half hour wait).

The Farnborough caff supplied a nice hot cuppa ...

... and there was another 30 minutes to wait at Basingstoke - well, nearly 40 as the Exeter train was also running late.

Mrs fbb was able to order a "jimmy hat" as a birthday gift (for someone else!) on her mobile phone, clever girl that she is.

And so, let the FARCE begin.

On Mondays to Saturdays there are two trains an hour to Salisbury, one continuing to Axminster and Exeter. Often a six car train loses three cars at Salisbury leaving the remaining three for the quieter bit of the line. 

On Sunday the service is only hourly from Waterloo to Exeter until 1715, so all trains are usually six cars.

Except the 1715 on Sunday 1st October. 

Upon arrival at Basingstoke it was clear that a very well loaded six cars worth of passengers were crammed into three. The crowds in the train refused to squeeze into a tighter lump (clearly they don't usually travel on London's Central Line!) and the guard was becoming more hysterical and less practical. 

In the end she closed the doors (with fbb and Mrs just squeezing in by force of personality, old age and bulk). There was not a word of apology on the train.

About forty frustrated passengers were left on Platform 2 with an hour to wait. On leaving the platform there was an almighty crunch as something immovable at the edge of the platform - possibly it was the edge of the platform - graunched the outside of the door against which Mrs fbb was pinned.

There is a 1745 from Waterloo but it doesn't stop at Basingstoke. Did anyone arrange for that extra stop?

By now the train was about 20 minutes late, not at all ideal for the single track sections west of Salisbury.

Fortunately all exit and egress was from the opposite side to that occupied by the fatigued, sweaty and crushed fbbs. 

Then came the announcement, "we will be putting an extra three coaches on at Salisbury." Better than nothing but a bit late in the day!

The farce continued with the Tisbury Trauma. Only three cars can call at Tisbury. Actually five can, but because of  "regulations" the back three cars' doors are kept shut. Which, of course, meant that Tisbury-alighting passengers now had to clamber through to the just-added front three. Plus a selection of velocipedes. 

Then came Gillingham (G as in Gutted, not G as in Gin). Here our guard made a valiant effort to shut off the door that had been bashed at Salisbury. More delay.

35 minutes late at Axminster. And the reason?

Plain and simple incompetence, it would seem. On Sundays there are plenty of spare 159s at Salisbury (as was apparent when an extra was tacked on there) so there was no need to roster just three cars for the 1715. fbb guesses that six cars arrive in London at 1659 ...

... and three are held back to form the 1745, leaving just three for the 1715 and ensuring that the two trains (1715 plus 1745) offer no extra seats whatsoever, making the half hourly service a total waste of time. There is no scheduled arrival that might form the 1745.

It was a FARCE, but a very unpleasant one. Unpleasant for the 72 year-old fbbs who eventually found proper seats post Gillingham, but really unpleasant for the crowds left on Basingstoke Station with not a word of apology.

But, after a flagon of tea and a slice or three of toast - plus a good night's sleep - the old crocks were fully recovered. It was an "interesting" weekend!

 Next Karlberg Conumdrum blog : Thursday 5th October